“Jordan, I haven’t seen you in what? Five years? So, I don’t know if this is just because you’ve grown up or because you’re in college now, but you seem so confident. You’re so comfortable with yourself and that just makes me so happy. You have truly blossomed like a flower.”

A sunflower was the first thing that came to mind. I’ve always had a thing for sunflowers, bright and fearless. Standing tall and always reaching for the sky, for a taste of sunlight, sunflowers were utterly fascinating to me. When I was very young, my obsession probably had more to do with my mom having me take a picture with a sunflower than anything else. Looking back on this picture, sunflowers have become very symbolic for me. The image perfectly describes me for the majority of my childhood. A little girl with such strength, light, and promise right at her fingertips who hid behind those who seemed to have already figured it all out. With timid eyes, she peered out into the world from the shadows of the sunflowers that surrounded her, too afraid to reach for her own ray of sun.

I had been painfully shy growing up. I still am shy, just not quite as painful. In the right circumstances, I can fool people into seeing the extrovert of my now “extroverted” introversion. I still have my awkward moments and uncomfortable encounters, but I’ve grown up quite a bit in the last few years. I’ve experienced life in ways I never had before, and I’ve seen myself transform in the process.

Prior to this moment, I had realized this growth in small glimpses but, not to its full gravity. I have become a person who’s far less concerned about what people think. I am at a point in my life where I am who I am and I am comfortable with that realization. I am aware of my many faults, not all of them, of course. I am effortfully putting my talents to use while working to shrink my list of shortcomings.

I can only pray that this blossoming continues, and that one day I’ll be as bold, strong, and magnificent as a sunflower.

Still on the hunt for the sunflower photo mentioned above. Here’s my temporary place holder… oops!

2 thoughts on “Sunflowers

  1. Jordan – This post made me think – that’s why you and Regina get along so well! 🙂 Regina was so shy in kindergarten that at the first parent-teacher conference for her – in November – her teacher asked if she could talk… We said, “yes! And did you know she can read?” – don’t think she believed us about the talking or the reading – but she handed her a book the next day at school and Regina read it for her. Ha! Took her a long time to get her to talk… BUT she loves you and being with you and having your friendship. This blog is grand – don’t know if I’m savvy enough to do a blog of my own – but will certainly take the time to read yours – since I like what I see girl! 🙂 – Michaeleen – Regina’s mom

    Liked by 1 person

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