A letter I wrote to Lily as we left for our freshman year of college:
I’ve been thinking a lot about how much you and our friendship have meant to me throughout the years, and I figured I might as well write you a letter to read on your flight. I have many, many things to say and stories to tell, but everything would be much too confusing if I didn’t start from the beginning. So let’s start there. The beginning. On the shabby soccer fields was where the two, much younger versions of ourselves met for the first time. How incredible is it to think back to that first day, and realize how, in that moment, we were utterly unaware of all the memories we would make together, all of the movie nights, cabin trips, plane rides, and laughter we would share. We’ve learned together, laughed together, and launched from cliffs into water together. And, throughout all of these incredible moments, I have discovered quite a lot about the magnificent Lily Mueller.
Although our past English teachers would attempt to guillotine me for the lack of fluidity and cohesion in these sentences to follow, I pray that you can overlook this insanity and any “peevation” this version of stream of consciousness could cause you (P.S. the use of “peevation” is my noun for the verb peeved, in case that wasn’t clear). Prepare yourself for the paragraph filled with many random facts about YOU (feel free to show this to your new friends at college so that they may be ready to embrace your extravagant awesomeness).
1. She will ALWAYS surprise you, and because of her, I have learned to love surprises.
2. No matter how hard you try, she will NEVER be the one to make a decision.
3. I have known her for over 5 years now, and I know her pretty dang well. And, not to brag, but I am known for my ability to pick up on things and know what people are thinking and feeling with a single look. But, I could know her for 100 years and still not be able to read her every facial expression or feeling or thought. And that, will bother me for as long as I live. But, I will just have to learn to accept the fact that the only way I will ever know everything is if she decided to tell me.
4. If you've made plans, and she doesn’t text you all day, there is a really, REALLY good chance that something has come up, and she might need to cancel. Don’t take it too personally.
5. She is a big believer in “Dang,” “Man,” “Let it be,” “I can’t decide,” and Diet Dr. Pepper.
6. Her intelligence will never cease to amaze you.
7. Her driving manners should, in no way, be associated with the driving considered typical in Minnesota (I think she pretends she’s driving in California, or something. She will cut people off without hesitation, and occasionally make you wish you had a second set of brakes on the passenger side).
8. She is full of life and almost always ready for an adventure, except for those times when she just needs to be left alone to reboot (I think we have that in common, but I’m not nearly as brave as she is).
9. She is hands down the most determined, self-motivated individual I have ever met in my life. So, be aware, nothing will ever stop her or slow her down (I swear she was bore to conquer adversity time and time again).
10. Don’t EVER make her watch “The Spectacular Now,” just trust me. Don’t.
11. She LOVES her family, so don’t feel bad if she needs to take a raincheck with you in order to have some family time.
12. If you start crying, she might not think she knows what to do, but really, she knows the best thing to do. Simply listen.
13. She is beautiful. I don’t care what she says. If you’ve ever seen her face light up when she laughs, you know what I’m talking about. And then, on top of that, she has the most amazing heart.
14. She honestly believes she’s “stealing” stuff from you when she comes over and grabs a pop (or you might call it a soda) from your fridge or a bag of pretzels from your pantry.
15. You can tell when she’s lying or when she doesn’t one-hundred percent believe what she’s saying when she says things twice, her voice tapers off casually, and, on occasion, she throws in a cool dude head nod with a slight down-turned mouth.
16. She may be younger than most of her friends, but don’t let that fool you. She can keep up with anybody and will “out-do” you in just about anything.
17. If you haven’t seen "crazy-Lil" you don’t know her well enough. Sorry to break it to you. She occasionally becomes insanely hyper and out of control. She’s a total dork, but you still gotta love her.
18. Lily is a passionate, intelligent, loving, confident, dependable, responsible, and breath-taking human being. Her accomplishments will be greater than you could ever imagine, and her heart, larger than life. And, if you ever look up her name on Urban Dictionary you’ll see that Lily “is a success at life,” and “usually kicks ass at everything she does.” (And, I sincerely apologize, I did not care enough to make a Works Cited.)
I have learned more about myself in the last 5 years, and I know that is thanks to you. You challenged me to stopping letting other people define me. You reminded me that it’s okay to not always meet other people’s expectations. You taught me that life is incredibly boring if you don’t make an effort to catch people off guard and do something they would never see coming. You offered words of encouragement on my hardest days. You shared boatloads of laughter in a million different situations. You said nothing when all I needed was for you to listen. And, you said everything I needed to hear when I had nothing left to say.
This year is going to be a time filled will major changes and lots of transitioning. It will be so weird not being around you. In the past, I pretty much always knew what you were up to, we hung out all the time, and I’m probably your biggest fan (aside from your parents). We always had each others’ backs and we seemed to attack every problem, each disaster, any kind of insignificant drama head-on, but always together. And that is what I will miss the most, being by your side living life with you. I’d love more than anything to witness you transform into an even more incredible, independent, and inspiring person than you already are. And, as much as it breaks my heart to be living over a thousand miles apart, I wouldn’t trade these last five years with you for the world. I hope that you never become too cool for me. I pray that you’ll share all of your amazing college adventures and stories with me. I wish that we will never grow out of movie dates and Diet Dr. Pepper.
I hope you look at your Jar of Joy, your “True Friendship” canvas, and your “L” collage and think about me sometimes 🙂 Don't you forget about me, because I seriously will drive 1,403 miles to show up at your door!
I love you from negative infinity to positive infinity back and forth infinite times,
and Best Friend